


Bump In The Night

by alex_is_away



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt Dean Winchester, M/M, Panic Attacks, Post Season 7, not wincest
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-09
Updated: 2018-08-09
Packaged: 2019-06-24 11:25:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,096
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15629724
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alex_is_away/pseuds/alex_is_away
Summary: Dean is completely broken after Cas releases the Leviathans. Sam is there to help put him back together.





	Bump In The Night

Dean walked out of the gas station, two water bottles in hand. “Wow Dean, I don’t think I’ve ever seen you drink water… Are you a shifter?” Sam joked, taking one of the bottles and drinking half in one go. “Joke all you want Sam, but we will be on the road a while. Just want to keep awake, ya know?” Sam didn’t question his brother further, he was just glad he wasn’t drinking himself to sleep tonight. Dean had been nursing a bottle until he passed out every night since he watched Cas walk into that water supply and not walk out, but as much as it hurt Sam to watch his brother beat himself up over it, he knew that he couldn’t stop Dean from dealing with it his way.

 

After about 20 minutes into the drive, Sam had already fallen asleep. This left Dean with his thoughts and the open night roads to keep him company. ‘ _ _I don’t know why I didn’t try harder to convince Cas that it was a bad idea. I mean I didn’t even say goodbye to him.’__ Dean cleared his throat, feeling a small pressure slowly build in his chest. The noise he made woke up Sam, and he felt the younger man looking at him. “Hey, are you-” He was cut off by Dean waving him off. “Yeah Sammy, I’m fine just some heartburn. Go back to sleep.” With that said, Sam nodded and rolled back over on his side to face the window, and drifted back to sleep.

 

His mind was quiet for another half hour, but the pressure in his chest stayed. He drank the rest of his water, still thinking it was just some bad heartburn, and returned his focus to the road. ‘ _ _Why does something bad happen to everyone I care about? Mom and Dad are gone, hell, I’ve even lost Sammy more than once!’__ He felt something wet on his face. After running a hand over his cheek, he realized that he was crying. He slowly pulled over, trying his hardest not to wake Sam up. ‘ _ _Why do I even keep trying? Everything I touch seems to get fucked up in some way. Maybe things would be better off if I wasn’t around.’__ Quiet sobs shook his body. He soon began to notice that the slight pressure he felt earlier now felt like there was someone sitting on his chest, making it harder and harder to breathe by the minute. ‘ _ _Am I- am I dying? What the hell is happening to me? Why can’t I breathe?’__ Dean felt himself trying to breathe, but the air just wouldn’t come to him.

 

Dean decided that he really needed help and shook Sam awake, trying to form a complete sentence while hyperventilating. “Woah Dean, what’s wrong, are you okay?” Sam’s expression was full of concern and fear. “I don’t- don’t know. Can’t breathe. I’m scared Sam- Sammy.” Sam immediately recognized the situation. “Dean- hey, look at me.” He waited for his brother to meet his gaze before continuing, his voice low and calming. “You’re having a panic attack. Listen to my voice, I’m going to help you through this.” Sam had gone through this a few times when he was in college, and Jess helped him through them, so he had a general understanding on how to help Dean, though everyone is different. “How about we go outside, the fresh air could really-” He was cut off by his older brother grabbing his arm and shaking his head quickly, Dean’s breathing speeding up. “Alright, we don’t have to do that. We can stay right here, okay?” The older man nodded slightly, not letting go of Sam’s arm. “Dean, is okay if I touch you? I’d like to rub your back, is that alright?” Dean hesitated for a moment before nodding once again.

 

Sam began to slowly rub small circles on his brothers back, trying to calm him down. “We need to slow your breathing down, can you do me a big favor and breathe with me, Dean?” Dean barely heard him, as he was pulled back into his thoughts. ‘ _ _What if this is it for me? What if the last thing I do in life? What if I am never able to breathe again?’__ Dean felt a large hand on his knee and was pulled back to reality. “Hey, it’s going to be okay Dean, I’m here. Let’s breathe okay? In and out.” Sam proceeded to breathe deeply and after the first few times, Dean joined him. The younger hunter reached into the glove-box and pulled out a few napkins that he kept in there, and wiped away the tears that continued to pour down his brother’s face.

 

They sat like that for 15 more minutes, Sam had stopped breathing with Dean, but he never stopped drawing circles on his back with his hand. “I think- I think I’m good now, Sammy.” Sam hummed in response, but neither of them moved. “I’ve never had something like that happen to me before, how did you know?” Dean questioned, looking up at the younger man. “Well, I had a couple of panic attacks when I was back at Stanford. Ya know, the college stress just got to me, and my mind didn’t know how to cope with it.” Dean nodded, not knowing what to say anymore. “If you don’t mind me asking, what do you think triggered it?” Sam asked carefully, not wanting to set off another attack. “Yeah, it’s fine. I was just thinking about Cas. About how everyone I care about seems to get hurt in some way or ends up dead.” His voice started to shake, new tears appearing in his eyes. “Hey, it’s okay. You don’t need to relive it right now. Come here, Dean.” Sam opened his arms for his brother, and Dean didn’t think twice before falling into them.

 

Sam held him for as long as he needed, he understood that things like that took a lot out of someone. Slowly rocking them back and forth, he hummed ‘ _ _Hey Jude__ ’ because he knew that the song never failed to soothe him. “Thanks, Sammy.” Dean mumbled into his brother’s shirt before drifting to sleep. Sam smiled and carefully moved Dean over to the passenger seat before getting out and made his way to the driver's side, looking at Dean once more to make sure he was okay before driving the rest of the way to Bobby’s house. Things were okay for now, Dean was safe, and that’s all that mattered to Sam.


End file.
